Let’s play ‘were those fireworks or did someone on my street just get shot’
actually i think the biggest plot twist in one direction is this
The most impressive one because it actually looks like she’s saying that..
sexting is so weird i did it once and the guy was getting really into it and i was eating a pack of doritos and playing final fantasy
The best super power ever has to be the power to refill things. Think about it, your glass is empty, refill it without getting up. Your bank account empty, power to refill it. Your bed is empty of a person of your preferred gender, refill it and have some fun.
At first I was all:
Well that’s the stupidest thing I ever heard.
But then I was all like:
GENIUS! PURE UNADULTERATED GENIUS!
person annoying you?
refill their bladder
oh my god i’m laughing cause i was watching lazarus rising and everyone was like omg what raised you from hell and ruby was like when this thing bleeds the earth quakes and another demon was like it’s the end of times but it turned out just to be this little cutie
SIT DOWN AND THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU’VE DONE
WHILE I PREPARE MY TORTURE MATERIAL
Ugh how do you expect me to decide what college to attend or who I want to marry or what I want to do for the rest of my life
I CAN’T EVEN DECIDE WHERE TO PUT A STICKER BECAUSE PEELING OFF THE BACK AND HAVING IT STAY IN ONE PLACE FOREVER IS TOO BIG OF A COMMITMENT FOR ME TO LIVE WITH
i just had a dream that macklemore was at my house and he told me that he’d spent all the money he made from Thrift Shop and couldn’t buy food and i said “aw do you need some snacklemore” and he punched me in the face